I've been a basket case of nerves recently -- maybe hormones? Not sure, but whatever my problem is, I'm ready for it to go away!
Saturday night, Stephen and I watched "Changeling" with Angelina Jolie. I had been told awhile back that this was a "good movie." .........DOES THE PERSON WHO TOLD ME THIS NOT KNOW ME AT ALL?!?!?!?!? I canNOT watch movies like that. They get to my head too much. I cried so much that on Sunday morning, everything was blurry because my eyes were so swollen and puffy.
I think what really gets to me about the movie is that it is based on a true story -- and while I know that there are sick, sick people in this world, and I know that things like that happen, it just scares the ever loving you-know-what out of me when I think about it happening to MY baby.
Stephen and I just don't watch scary movies - he doesn't think they're any good, and I am just too vulnerable to scary stuff. It messes with my head, affects my sleep, and stays with me for too long. I can watch (most) episodes of CSI-type shows without it really bothering me, but "based-on-true-story" movies like Changeling fall under the "don't watch" category at our house. And now I need to change the subject because I don't want any more of this creepiness of my blog!
Today I had my Teacher Education Program admission interview at Henderson. I was a nervous WRECK beforehand. I was so upset... it actually got to the point where I was having to tell myself -- "GET a GRIP, Stephanie!" I was super nervous about the interview and my portfolio. I cried (hard) no less than THREE different times within a 20-minute period before the interview. I'm not sure what qualifies as a panic attack... but I'm pretty sure that's what I was having.
I know the reasoning behind this one -- I had to do this same interview when I was an Elementary Education major several years ago -- during a semester when I had pretty much lost all interest in college. Or classes. Or preparing/studying for classes. It wasn't a pretty semester, and I've really had to work hard to make up for all the mistakes I made that semester.
That semester, I had to do this same interview -- and I completely bombed it. I didn't study the sample questions, I didn't have a complete portfolio, I wasn't prepared AT ALL, and I did horrible. I didn't pass it.
I was so much more prepared this time around -- but I still let my nerves get the best of me and my poor masacara was basically all gone by the time I walked into the interview room. I'm sure my face was red and swollen, but (haha) maybe the interviewers felt sorry for me and awarded me more "points" since I was so upset. Not really. ;) I think I did okay. I answered all the questions just like I had studied them and I feel like everything went fine. I hope so, at least. I'll find out my results on November 5th.
I'm ready for a few days with no tears and minimal stress. The worst part of this week is over and I am SO ready for a few days with nothing big on the agenda! (Or scary creepy movies!)